TODAY"S PAINTBALL SESSION WAS AWESOME!! Though many pangseh in the last minute, i'm quite glad quite a number came down... As usual, only a few of the girls could make it.. Nevertheless, we had fun... Everyone couldn't stop talking about how they shot others or vice versa.. Haha.. Looks like I've achieved what I aim for.. The whole purpose of me organizing this was to ensure that there's team bonding.. Since everyone graduated, we never had a chance to come together and have fun.. I'm glad we did today... Now, I'm looking forward to organizing another outing.. This time, it's for everyone.. Where to next??Hmm.. Feel free to give some ideas:D

Wow!! After 6 days of not working & just worked for 2 days, I'm off to another week of leave!! Haha..
This is when I totally love my job.. Haha.. Hmm.. What should I do now... Anyone free to meet up?? Haha..

This is what you get when 2 guys are bored with needles to spare.. Haha..

All my life, I've always put others before me.. To me, their happiness out way mine.. I'm not sure if this is true anymore... Lately, I've been the middleman of a conflict which I feel is taking a toll on myself... I try my best to please both parties but the truth is, it's making me more miserable... They say "syurga di bawah tapak kaki ibu"(literally means heaven is beneath the feet of your mum).. Basically, it is the duty of a child to obey everything their parents tell them to.. I'm afraid I've been living such life all my life... To others, it may seem that I'm such a filial son... But seriously, I don't even know who I am anymore... Am I becoming just a representation of my parents?? How long am I gonna live such life?? When will I ever take control of my own life?? These questions have been bugging me a lot lately... No doubt the advice given by parents ought to be taken seriously for they have been through life longer than us.. But really, what's life without making mistakes?? This is really bad..

Here's the thing, living a life under your parents advice/guidance isn't always good.. Let me paint the picture for you.. Imagine life without or perhaps minimal mistakes... The child, let's name him A, will be precondition to certain ways of life.. The fact that he will not fail as long as he obeys the rules... Seems good huh?? However, the problem comes when things don't turn out the way he expects it to be... A small failure can really snowball into him not being able to get up on his own and learn from his mistakes... Meanwhile, a child B who goes through life the hard way, meaning without any guidance, indeed makes more mistakes than child A... But this child B will be able to understand the consequences of the mistakes he made even more clearly than that child A whose living life like a robot... So basically, my point that I wish to bring forth is that life is something that is different for everyone... No two people can go through life the same way... Fate will decide what your future will be.. Therefore, though it may be good to hear advices from other people, you have to take that chance to make a difference in your life..

Enough said.. Frankly, I've been living the life of child A... It's not something which I am proud of.. I'm slowly beginning to see the importance of taking control of my own life... During today's summon at the mosque, I began thinking of it... How am I gonna life my life? How am i able to resolve conflicts without compromising my happiness? etc.. Though I've yet to find these answers, I'm pretty confident that I will be able to get up on my own if I were to ever fall...

P.S: Funny huh?? For me to suddenly come up with this... Haha.. It feels great after I wrote it down.. Hopefully, you guys benefit from this experience that I share:)

Lies, Lies, Lies.. It sucks when you got no one to turn to.. I guess I'll just carry on with a smile on my face to please everyone:D

Sometimes people change.. Some for the better while others for the worst.. Frankly, I'm not sure if I'm being me anymore... It's like I haven't been feeling myself lately.. I get pissed off rather easily these days... I know it's wrong and I'm trying to do something about it.. But seriously, what exactly is the root of my sudden change of behaviour?? Could it be work? Cause frankly, the calls I'm getting these days are no more than prank calls.. Mostly are people who just love to 'keng'(a term used to denote people who loves to fake it).. I know that my line of job requires me to treat every patient with TLC(Tender-Loving-Care) but how the heck am I supposed to when they're just bullshitting right in front of my eyes?? I was pretty sure this wasn't what I signed up for... I wanna save lives.. Those who really needs it.. No doubt I've save some but the number of these people who loves to keng are increasing.. Man, what's wrong with Singaporeans these days?? Are they that bored that they need to play punk with us?? Sometimes I wonder how those old timer paramedics can tahan for so long... It's challenging when our job requires us to face the public.. It sucks that we're being treated like shit when we're here trying to save a person's life.. Haiz... I hope this ends soon:(

Recently i had a heart to heart talk with one of my paramedics(a.k.a PM).. There were 3 of us.. My fellow medic, the PM and me.. It was late at night and we couldn't sleep.. So we talked about random stuff... Then this PM started talking about her life.. It seems to me that this PM came from a rough background.. Used to be a drinker etc.. Somehow or another, this PM turned over a new leaf and decided to join the force.. She began telling us about what made her change completely... It was interesting to hear about her side of the story.. Well, she's not the only one... In fact, in the force, there are many of the PMs who're like her... Before I became a medic, I've always had this impression that these people are well educated.. Not those who had a bad background.. Don't get me wrong... I'm not condeming them... As a matter of fact, I really look up to them... Having to go the extra mile just to save someone else's life, it reflects the dedication they have towards this job.. It made me realised how fortunate I have been to have been brought up in a safe & controlled environment... Thus, I've decided to put in more pride in my work these days... I love my job:)